When I was 20, I tried Bikram yoga and was scared during my first hot yoga class. The heat was intense, and having to look into my own eyes was unnervingl. In the middle of the class, I tried to hobble out of the room when my hands cramped up from dehydration - pretty sure that my life was over, but the super nice instructor herded me back into class and convinced me everything was going to be ok. In my whole life, I've never been as sore as I was after that class. I worked and stretched muscles I didn't even know I had! But, I kept going back and was hooked on hot yoga after those first couple of classes. Strangely enough, I wouldn't change a thing or one drop of sweat!
When I first started yoga, I did it for the physical experience and in every class, I would beat myself up if I couldn't get into the full expression of a pose - just like in my life. I was hard on myself, rigid, and always expecting perfection the first time I tried something. Over my years of practicing without even realizing it, yoga has turned into a much deeper, meditative practice for me. It's not about the physical aspect anymore. I've learned how to let things go, and how to laugh at myself, whether I'm falling out of a pose or busting my butt on the sidewalk.
I have generalized anxiety disorder which means my brain is constantly going going going and always worrying about things that I know I have no control over. When I step onto my yoga mat, all of that melts away. Some days, it's harder for my brain to slow down than others, but I always leave class feeling lighter, like the worries and stresses have literally melted away with the heat. Yoga is a release for me.
In the early days of my practice, there was a month that I would cry like a baby after every camel pose....and I mean sobbing hot mess, alligator tears. Now, I realize that I was probably doing this because I was going through a lot during that time in college. The experience taught me that if I need to cry, I might as well go ahead and let it out because I'll feel better afterwards. Better out than in!
Yoga helps me live healthier overall. I eat healthier because I don't want to feel like I've got a belly full of crud when I'm in class. Because of yoga, I also stay better hydrated, which I find difficult during the winter. Yoga has helped me with my body image as well because I see that I am so much more capable and beautiful than my brain allows me to see on its own.
When I took Bikram yoga in Charleston, SC, they gave out soaking wet, cold cloths after each class which literally felt like they had been dipped in an ice bath. While I was laying in savasana, the instructor would come around the room and place it on my forehead. I would almost have a panic attack at the end of every class because it was shocking to be so hot, and have this FREEZING cold cloth thrown on me. When I came to Revolution Hot Yoga and found hat they gave out lavender cloths at the end of class, I was not thrilled. I was so grateful to have them place the clothe over my shoulder. It's the little things, right?
I love the community of hot yoga. It's a very personal practice, but the fact that all the people in the hot room are going through the sweaty mess together is a fabulous feeling. I love experiencing the highs and the lows of the poses and classes as well. One easy, calm pose one day can turn into hell of a challenge the next day.
You never know, and you learn to just breath through it.
While I do love yoga, there are some days when all I want to do is go home, curl up on the couch with a glass of wine and a book, and be done with the day. On those days, I literally have to order myself to drive to the studio. And of course, I never regret that I went to yoga, and I always feel so much better afterwards.
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| This is Natasha D'Amours' yoga story. |
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| Go to RHY website. |
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