Yoga Is All About Acceptance

 Ever since having my third child about three years ago, I have begun to increasingly lose focus. Around the same time, I added hot yoga to my exercise routine after being introduced to it by a friend.  It wasn’t until I started practicing yoga that I realized how much I lacked focus likely due to a crazy life as a working mom of three very young and energetic kids, wife, daughter, homemaker, blah, blah, blah.

Honestly, I’m not sure how to describe my thoughts about that first class.  I remember feeling beyond hot and watching the clock counting the minutes the class had left.  I'd never sweated so much in my life but, strangely enough, I enjoyed it at the same time. After my first week, I was hooked.  I began consistently practicing at that studio for the next year, and my practice stayed mostly the same with the heat and stagnant air became my focus for most classes.  But, there was something about the yoga that kept me going back for more.  

At almost a year into my practice, I experienced two life-changing events.  I began doing yoga under the direction of Rebecca (Jordan-Turner) and injured my SI (sacroiliac) joint.  I've suffered many injuries over the last 25 years, all painful and some with lasting effects, but none took me out like the SI injury.  The constant pain and effect to my mind was completely debilitating.  

For the better part of my life I have been an extremely competitive person, placing high expectations on myself which can be stressful and often overwhelming. Because of these, I continued to practice consistently after the injury, often muscling my way through class in pain rather than listening to my body, not pushing my limits, and breathing, breathing, breathing.  

In class, I spent the entire 90 minutes in my head, freaking out about how much pain I was in. It's important to note that the pain was NOT from the yoga, it was from an injury that I wasn't respecting nor properly caring for.   However, I wasn't willing to rely on medication to get through the pain, and because the source of the injury was unknown, I had an intense fear of repeating it.  Everything in my life from relationships to day-to-day activities was negatively affected. I knew that I needed to address the situation, but I wasn't exactly sure how to do that. Something had to give.

Desperately looking for any solution, I began to try to get out of my head and focus on Rebecca’s teaching.  That one seemingly small decision changed my life and my practice completely.  "Slow down.  Do what you can do today.  This is a process."  I had heard these words over and over again, but they had not resonated with me until I incorporated them into my practice. 

With Rebecca's support, guidance, and acceptance, I was able to begin to accept my practice as it was THAT day, SI injury and all.  Once I got out of my head, I was able to feel the stages of a posture that I needed to go through with THIS body, to work into the postures at my natural pace, and shed all (well ok, almost all) of my expectations.  Wow!  The difference was mind blowing.  I began to seek out Rebecca's classes and stood right in the front voracious for her instruction.

Then about six months later, Rebecca left the studio.  I quickly sought her out and began a consistent practice in the temporary RHY studio last year.   At this point, still struggling with the painful SI injury, I had no choice but to take a step back and focus on the basics of my practice.  Rebecca and my fellow RHY yogis totally accepted and encouraged me and my practice: good days, bad days, sassy attitude days, or whatever kind of day I might be having.  Through their support, it finally started to hit home with me that, "Sure, my body hurts and can’t do what I want it to do, and so what?  So what?!" I was finding acceptance of myself. 

Beginning to accept my limitations as a result of injury was just the start as I am now working to accept many things about myself and my life that I have previously struggled with. I'm happy to say that my injury is healing, slowly but surely.  My presence, focus, acceptance, and breath on the mat is there (most days), and I am seeing the same benefits transfer off the mat into my life. Of course, some moments and days are better than others.  

This learning will be my lifelong journey, but one that began through yoga and the support of my RHY family.  Each and every one of my fellow yogis is a beautiful light in my life, an inspiration, and I am truly honored to be a part of this community.

This is Chelsea Firestone's yoga story.

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